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Love and Money

Published on June 3, 2012, by

“We moved into a place a year ago, and when we moved in everyone one close to her was “suggesting” that we move into a house. When it was discussed between the two of us she didn’t feel comfortable doing that because we didn’t make the same amount of money. After being married and in a relationship with women who made more than I did, I have learned to put aside foolish pride but working together has made it difficult because I don’t talk about our relationship much at work but some of the people we she works with are getting married, and it seems that she is upset that I haven’t asked her to marry yet.

After going through a divorce and break up with women who make more than I do how do I convince my girlfriend that she is the only one. I have acheived a national certification in on field and am working on a second but her BS degree makes it hard.”

I could use some clarification on some aspects of this situation. Some things aren’t so crystal clear so I might have to read between the lines so to speak. It would appear that he’s had two prior relationships with an ex-wife and an ex-fiancee or girlfriend, and both of those made more money than he did.

Now with his current girlfriend (actually I have no clue whether it’s still current now), it would appear that the roles are reversed and he made more money than she does. If that is the case, then he should understand totally her being uncomfortable with the difference in pay scale. He was able to get over it, but may be his girlfriend can’t or isn’t ready yet. Money issues, can take a great relationship and turn it very bad very quickly if not nipped in the butt.

Another thing that caught my eye is that it seems they both worked together. I’m not sure if that means in the same building, or in the same office, or the same lab. Which ever the case may be, her “friends” that he mentioned, he saw as well and might be your friends too. I was kinda seeing trouble in the waters there if he wasn’t careful. Like beance said, jumping through hoops is not the way he should plan on continuing his relationship with her.

It’s one thing for his girlfriend to say “My friends at work…”, but if he saw these friends on a daily basis as well…ouch. Unless he was prepared to say “So what about them? Who cares. It’s our lives we need to be concerned about.” Then seeing all her friends look at him with scorn, because he wouldn’t “pop the question” or give a bigger diamond than others, or get her pregnant, might take its toll on him and the relationship.

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